Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Accumulation

It’s snowing today. We’re supposed to get a good dump of the white stuff over the next few days. I love snow around the holidays, it makes things seem more festive. But in general, I’m not a big fan. Many people revel in the crisp fresh beauty – the cleanliness of the air after a snowfall and the bright glistening of the crystalline veil. I can appreciate this. And with Incrediboy's sense of endless wonder in the world, maybe I'll feel differently in general this year. But snow is more to me like nature’s nuclear fallout, blanketing over a dormant world, long since active and vibrant. The nail in the coffin of hope for fair weather. The punctuation at the end of a dead sentence.

I think I might suffer from that seasonal affective disorder. The holidays sustain my mood, but come January I begin to wilt, and by March I’m mentally climbing the walls with cabin fever and desperation for better days. I feel hungry and thirsty on a molecular level, and nothing seems to quench it until nature’s hibernation breaks and my skin can once again freely drink fresh air, warmth and sunlight.

In the depth of the winter season, I become the Earth – atrophied, stunted, and frozen. Snowflakes, in the form of days and motions, accumulate until I’m covered and lost beneath them. Walk by, even closely, and I bet you wouldn’t even see me there.

16 comments:

Alecia said...

Oh my God, do we live in the same place? We must...hahaha. Already this year, the greatness that is western, ny...has recieved enough snow to last me a life time. I don't deal well. I, like you, get tired of it. Not only is there a lot every year, but it lasts forever. Spring comes in June...summer starts in August. I, like you, am clawing at the walls by March, digging a hole in the ground that will hopefully lead me to somewhere warm and delightful. And I as I stood outside today in the wind, and the cold, and the falling snow, just to brush my car off and move it, I thought - "why oh why oh why do I live here?" --- If you figure it out, let me know. hehe.

Anonymous Assclown said...

Good news and bad news with SAD (if you do have it) - bad news is that it's only going to get worse. January and February are usually the worst months. Good news is that SAD can be treatable with just light therapy (as long as it's not associated with any other depressive disorders). Open your curtains, turn on your lights and, most importantly, take daily walks outside.
I'd guess that nearly everyone suffers from winter blahs, but women in their 30's are the high risk group for SAD.

naive-no-more said...

This confirms it. I am weird! I absolutely love it when it snows. Even after the holidays. I know it makes everything harder - travel, vehicle maintenance, all that - but it is so pretty. It makes everything prettier than it is.

What I don't like is the long thaw. It's no longer pretty then. Just mud and slush. This is when spring can't get here fast enough.

McSwain said...

Sounds like someone needs to take Incrediboy out, build a snowman and have a snowball fight! The sunlight, even if filtered, would help if you do have SAD. And Incrediboy's enthusiasm would warm your heart! Maybe that's easy for me to say from sunny L.A., but I so miss the snow of home.

bigwhitehat said...

Clew, you can't possible become that unobtrusive. I'm sure you sparkle year round.

Lori said...

Hey Clew!

Things are so busy here and I haven't had a chance to write - or read - as much as I'd like.

I can definitely relate to some of this snow talk! I used to love, love, love it when I was younger (and the world was all romance and wonder!), but it's harder to love when you have to drive in it, etc.! It is so absolutely beautiful, though...and when I can just stay in the house, cuddle up and read I'm good to go! I used to feel so much like you do, but as I've gotten older I don't feel so SAD anymore. I'm with the crew, though....open your drapes and go for the light!

martie said...

I often lament the horrors of the dreaded snowfall. I hate to drive in it and hate to shovel it. But watching the grandchildren play in it and slide down the hill in our backyard kind of "coats" the bad feelings with a sparkling wonder I thought was long gone! I'm glad it isn't.

Ruben said...

I love the snow, the cold, crisp air. It is weather that is fat guy friendly.

Rebecca said...

hahaha, great post!

I always say if I lived in England, I'd be homicidal... hahaha.

I'm getting all of your snow tomorrow!!! :(

Bougie Black Boy said...

well written. I hate the snow. but i DO love winter.
Best Line:
The punctuation at the end of a dead sentence.

wonderful. And that sentense describes winter so well.
January is stale. . .

African girl, American world said...

First time here - thanks for the visit.

Yes, you are a writer! I had to read this post 3 times to absorb the wonderful way you put words together.

Beautiful!

I'm in KY and they let school out an hour early and singing about all this snow we're getting - thing is not one flake has hit the ground. Folk losing their mind left and right!

Laurie said...

Jan/Feb/March - I wish that I could get out of Michigan during those months! Save for the occasional above 40 degree day when I can get my bike on the road.

I like your description of winter, it's perfect.

Seabiscuit said...

The last paragraph was vivid.

On the subject of snow, I dearly detest it. I think that I do because if we receive 3 inches, the entire city comes to a halt. I don't like that. We don't receive snow often- usually 1-3 times a year. Last year, we had one snow. It lasted for one day. The next day all the snow was melted by lunch. I don't mind that too much. But, I can do without it. I like being able to move around.

:)

Bainwen Gilrana said...

I'll chime in on hating winter. The cold, the dark, it all contributes to a general feeling of malaise that won't quite lift until the first thaw comes. Sometime around the end of February, there will be a wind that doesn't hurt so much. The air will smell damp instead of frozen. Winter will know that it's time is nearly done.

Well do I understand the horror of the creatures in Narnia lamenting that the White Witch made it "always winter and never Christmas!"

ProfessorGQ said...

I love snow too...only when it's clean and no slush and the whole nine.

Harry Yak said...

that was soooo much more elegant than saying, "winter sucks, yo!"